“I can see the future…kind of.”

Impressively bad outside of the Dreams needle drop during the credits lmao. With that being said, I laughed so hard at multiple times and would recommend for that alone.

“He’s an earth sign, they found him in the dirt!”

Pretty horseshit stuff outside of the jester scene. The script was so generic I could be convinced they used AI to write the thing. And what’s the point of having tarot monsters if you can barely see them because of how fucking dark everything is? I don’t think it tops The Bye Bye Man in of bad but it’s pretty close!

“Cat’s supposed to be in a hat, not in a backpack!”

I hated mostly every second of the 139 minute runtime but the old people in my theater were AMPED multiple times so good for them.

“I used to hate pools.”

It’s no The Bye Bye Man, but it’s peak “fuck you, it’s January” cinema.

“Guess I gotta go kill Barlow.”

I appreciate when an adaption takes chances and makes changes to the original story but I was 50/50 on this as a whole. The opening credits had me very excited but the first half didn’t really hook me. The atmosphere was good but everything was flat. Got much better in the second half when Mark started getting more screen time with the vampires and Ben became interesting instead of generic movie author.

“Jack and June went up the hill to fuck each other's brains out!”

I was expecting more. David Dastmalchian does good work, the aesthetic is pleasing, and the practical aspects are gnarly when used but the scares mostly fell flat. It’s a neat concept but feels like it would’ve fit better as a V/H/S short. 

Also, the AI-generated images are frustrating. There was no need for it. It might not seem like a big deal since it was only a few frames, but don’t accept this nonsense in your movies.

“I’m Joan Carbunkle, NBC Standards.”
“Oh, I didn’t know they had any.”

Has some good moments and the cast is fun but I couldn’t fully buy in.

“Tell me there isn’t something horrible in that bag?”
“No.”

At its best when Jason Bateman is on screen instead of a voice on the phone. Nothing earth shattering but it was never a dull time.

“You can choose, Hèra. You can choose how this ends.”

RIP Wulf you would’ve loved The Story So Far. 

My brain is so rotted from years of Fire Emblem games that I couldn’t help but think “man, this looks like a Fire Emblem game at times!” Had fun with it, though. Not on the same level as the original trilogy, not really close, but still a good time.

“Do I look stupid?”
“No.”
“My sister and I were identical, so that must mean she didn't look stupid.”

Oddity had a good chunk of elements I normally dig in a movie (creepy house, creepy creature designs, generally a good and eerie atmosphere) but I wish the plot and performances clicked more. Not to say they are bad by any means, just wasn’t working for me.